It's 3:55am , what are you doing right now.....

Alright, well I can't sleep. I can hear Kalen snoring and the washing machine. The reason I am awake is that my DEAR daughter came and got into bed with me. She has been doing this a lot lately. I can't figure it out why. I've been told "It's the age." So has anyone else had their kids come on a repeated basis try to get into their beds. Of course I have to be the one to take her back to bed because Kalen is oblivious that she is there. So now I'm awake. I've unloaded the dishwasher, started a load of laundry, checked email, wrote Kalen a note, and now decided to blog.

So as some of you know, I've been in a funk. I guess it's been a combination of things. One big part is that I totally don't feel like I fit in anywhere sometimes. I've been told fairly recently, "Well most people feel this way," I just think to myself, really...... I doubt it. Let's see, I can't go to the store when I need to, hence the Dylan's wheelchair. Ever thought how you push a shopping cart and wheelchair at the same time. I keep thinking I should invent some sort of contraption to help not only those that have to push wheelchairs but strollers also. Then my next complaint is that I'm learning who my "real" friends are. It's sad to say that I don't have many. The dynamics of many have changed. I've been trying to figure out why we don't have "couple" friends that we go to the movies with, go out to dinner, etc. We've tried and I can't figure it out. My only conclusion is that we are different. We don't have close friends that come and visit us from out of town, I don't have a gym buddy (My mom doesn't count), and then at church of all places... few people actually talk to us. So how do I feel..... like we are different. And why are we different because we have a "special needs" child. That's the only conclusion that I can come up with. I am definitely not complaining but talking with a friend yesterday had my brains turning that we don't go to the movies with anyone, out to eat, shopping, etc. Why is that???? I mean I think we are nice, "normal", social people. We just have a different family situation.
Don't get me wrong, I have my dear, dear friends that I can talk to whenever I need to. Normally our conversations are about IEPs, PT, OT, our frustrated we are, having "typical" kids, having a special needs child. So we have those conversations then I know that we have a special friendship:)
I'm not trying to say that if I don't talk to you about these things then you are not my friend, but it's different. Anyhow......... this is how I've been feeling incase anyone wanted to know. It's not intended to hurt anyone's feelings. I could go on about a few more things, but seeing that it's now 4:10am, I'm sure I will regret reading this later on today.

Ball Pit/Pool

I am on the hunt for a ball pit for Dylan. I want to create a therapy room for Dylan at our house. One of the things I would like to have in the room is a ball pit. These things are not cheap, so I am trying to figure out a way to get one. Any ideas?????

Here's pic of one that I would like to get:

This would be a great thing for Dylan. It provides tons of sensory input, which Dylan needs. This has been on my wish list for Dylan for the past year!!!!!

Dentist:)

I am so happy to report that Dylan went to the dentist today for his first cleaning. He did awesome. I left in such a hurry I forgot to take the camera. We sang "itsy Bitsy Spider" and a few other songs hat he likes to help keep him calm. Only a few gaging spells. Only 1 tooth had tartar. Great job to mommy and daddy. We are so pleased that we found this dentist. They do great with special needs kids, plus we like them too for Brianna. Here's the link to their website, in case anyone is in need of a pediatric dentist: http://www.sacchildrensdentist.com/
We love the bubble wall:)

Husband Tag!!!!

What is his full name: Kalen Zachary Bjurstrom
How long have you been married: 5 1/2 years. 6 years in August
How did you meet: at work.... Vic's IGA. I worked in the deli and her was a checker. I would make him turkey sandwich.. white roll, turkey, lettuce, tomato, and provolone cheese. Yes I still remember
Who eats more sweets: Him, he gets candy from work or the chiropractor
Who said I love you first: He did......
How old is he: 30
Who is taller: Him
Who is smarter: Depends on what the topic is......
Who does the laundry: Me.. He will help sometimes, but I always have to put it away. Isn't "doing" laundry mean put it away????
Who pays the bills? Me, I consult him so he knows what's going on.
Who sleeps on the right side of the bed: Him if you are looking at the bed.
Who mows the lawn: Him, I "let" him do all the outside work, except plant flowers:)
Who drives: When we go on a date or it's the 4 of us, he does.
Who is more stubborn: He would say me, but I say..... me too.
Who kissed who first: He kissed me first. We were hanging out at his apartment on the balcony and he leaned over and kissed me. I was speechless.......
Who as more siblings: He does... him 2 me 1
Who wears the pants: We both wear the pants, but like Nicole said, my daugther does or at least thinks she does

I tag.....anyone that wants to do this:)

Summer Cooking!

Alright fellow blog readers. I am in need of recipes that are good during the summer. I really dislike cooking when it's hot. Turning on the oven doesn't sound too appealing, so with that said I am asking for your help. What are your favorite summer recipes? I am thanking you ahead of time:)

I am so annoyed....

I found out today that when we have respite, Dylan can't get any tube feedings done, because that is considered nursing care and respite isn't nursing care. It's too much of a liability for them, so I have to plan respite around feedings. That sucks. The supervisor told me to have a friend or neighbor on stand by for feedings while I'm out. Wouldn't I have my friends, neighbors, etc. do respite for me anyways and not use an agency. The whole reason I have respite is because I don't have anyone to watch my kids!!!!! So how now am I suppose to have him get his fluids while I'm out. Or also if Kalen and I were ever to go out of town, I guess Dylan wouldn't get fluids for a day since the workers aren't allowed to tube feed him. It's ridiculous to me. Anyhow I just needed to vent. I've been in a funk and this just made matters worse. Now I feel a little better that I got that off my chest.

Dancing Queen

I feel like I've been blogging a lot about Brianna, but I had to share with you all her dance moves. She wasn't dancing much in this one, but it's so funny how a 2.5 year old dances:) She loves to dance to "This Old Man". Dylan's teacher has some great cd's that uses while teaching Dylan. This is one that Brianna normally hears after the goodbye song that is played. She asks the teacher everyday, "This Old Man, This Old Man." We are all a little sick of it:)

Creative Little Girl

So my darling daughter loves to wear other's clothing, we've figured out. For some strange reason she loves to wear Dylan's shoes. When she wears them she insists on wearing them on the wrong feet. Go figure! She also loves to wear Kalen's hat. She loves trying to be like Daddy. She's a brave girl to put his hats on. She normally wears the hats that he wears while at work. I don't mean the ones where he's sitting in the office, I mean the ones' that he wears when he's in the field and it's 100 degrees. She's crazy, but we gotta love her:)

It's time to swim

Our little swimmer was so excited when I put out her pool that she got last year from Grandma and Grandpa. This kid loves the water. I think she should be a mermaid if they existed. She wanted me to joy her but I had to feed Dylan lunch. She loves splashing, only of course standing up. For some reason the day I took the pics she didn't sit down in the water. She is so fascinated with water. Hopefully she will take after me and tan, not like Daddy who burns easily. Well we found out that she is like Daddy and got a little red. I have to remember to put sunblock on her. We have the spray kind, but it always gets in her mouth. Any of you have good sunblock that you like to use on your kids????

ARRRRRRR!!!!!! I think she thinks she's a pirate;)

Sleep Study

I took Dylan to Kaiser in South Sacramento last Monday evening so he could have a sleep study done. We here him making strange gasping noises when he sleeps, plus he snores. (Almost as bad as Kalen) Anyhow we headed down there around 6:30 and traffic went smooth. Crazy for HWY 99. Anyhow.... it took awhile to get him all hooked up. He was a good sport. For someone who doesn't like his head touched or anything on his face he was a trooper. We find the official results in a few weeks, but the tech said that he had a quiet night. We were sent home at 4:30am. Yes you read that right.....4:30 in the morning. Dylan stayed asleep while all the stuff was taken off his head. What woke him up was when I transferred him to his wheelchair. We arrived home at 5am. I put Dylan in his bed and hoped that he would go to sleep. He eventually did, but man our whole day was messed up. Both him and I were exhausted. I'm still getting all the adhesive off of his face still.


Here's our happy Dylan..... little did he know what he was getting himself into.

The thing under his nose, bugged him the most.

I Did It

I woke up and ran 5 miles today. Man was it hot. It felt like it was noon but it was only 7:30am. My body felt sluggish at times, but I accomplished my goal. It took me longer that it would have in the past, but I did it! I feel full of energy right now, like I could do anything. Hopefully I don't get a headache from being in the sun. I'm debating if I want to try to find a running group. I just don't want to feel like I have to talk the whole time. That was what was great about running with my friend Stacie:) I miss those days. Anyhow.... I just wanted to share how happy I am that I did my exercising today. Thank you Kalen for watching the kids. I love you!!!

Mother's Day!!!!!

So these pics are out of order and I'm too lazy to fix them:) I fixed breakfast for my mom and the rest of the family. Yes I know it's Mother's Day but I felt like I should honor my mom. Kalen and the kids got me some beautiful flowers, gift card to Jamba Juice(it will last me awhile), and my jogging stroller fixed. YEAH!!!!! We had the rest of the family over for dinner. Kalen planned it all by himself, even down to the dessert. He BBQ'd. It was delicious, as Brianna says. Brianna and MaryEllen insisted on dressing up and this is the final product. Too cute!!!! They both had to have wands, and dress up shoes, glasses, a crown of some sort, a necklace and a ring. MaryEllen was a little disappointed that we only had one dress up dress. We need to get Brianna some more but it's not like we have play dates or anything. We need to start having some so if you know of any girls that love to dress up send them our way. I'd love to have some little girls or boys for Brianna to play with. So here's the pics of Mother's Day. I know I enjoyed celebrating the day with my family.


Dylan chilling on our bed. Yes it was still in the front room, but has now been moved. He was getting overstimulated with the girls screaming. What is it with little girls, screaming by the way when they play. Geez.

This is an awful pic. Kalen just took the pic without any warning. Scary!!!!!!!

Dad and Brian enjoying dessert. Kalen picked an awesome Strawberry custard cake. He knows I LOVE anything with strawberries.

Our dictator, QUEEN BRIANNA

Our little golfer guy, Henry. He was getting so frustrated that he couldn't crawl on the floor. He would slip because of the laminate.

Say Cheese!!!!!

My flowers from the kids and Kalen!!!

A very tired Kalen. Dylan was up a lot Saturday night, but Kalen took care of him so I could get some sleep for one day out of the year:)

Stephanie's Wedding Reception

Our dear friend Stephanie had her wedding reception last Saturday. We talked it up to Brianna all of last week. She hadn't seen Stephanie since March so she was really excited. You can't tell from the pics, but Brianna was ecstatic to see "Princess Stephanie", as Brianna called her. For some reason Brianna got camera shy. After we made it through the line, Brianna wanted to keep going back to talk to her, but yet she wouldn't talk when we did go through the line. What a weirdo.

Brianna and her friend, Luke danced the night away. It was so cute watching them dance. Those at the other tables thought it was so funny and cute. Brianna is our serious dancer. I keep meaning to post a video of her dancing. It's a hoot!

Our little girl is getting so big!

Weight Loss.... Update

Well, Sarah this is for you. This was a really bad week. I was able to run early Monday morning. I was hoping for 6 miles but ended up running 4. Not too bad. It's amazing how soon your body forgets what's it's accomplished. Now that construction is done, I will be able to exercise more. It was a little strange having someone in my house everyday. I couldn't imagine trying to exercise while my house was being put back together. Anyhow.... this week was better than I thought it would be. Next week will be better. I'm proud because I've really taken the time to figure out what I should eat and not just grab string cheese. I know some of you do that:) Anyhow the journey continues:)

A great Poem

Mothers Lie

Expectant mothers waiting for a newborn’s arrival say they don’t care what sex the baby is. They just want to have ten fingers and ten toes.

Mothers lie.Every mother wants so much more. She wants a perfectly healthy baby with a round head, rosebud lips, button nose, beautiful eyes and satin skin. She wants a baby so gorgeous that people will pity the Gerber baby for being flat-out ugly.She wants a baby that will roll over, sit up and take those first steps right on schedule (according to the baby development chart on page 57, column two). Every mother wants a baby that can see, hear, run, jump and fire neurons by the billions. She wants a kid that can smack the ball out of the park and do the toe points that are the envy of the entire ballet class. Call it greed if you want, but a mother wants what a mother wants.

Some mothers get babies with something more. Maybe you’re one who got a baby with a condition you couldn’t pronounce, a spine that didn’t fuse, a missing chromosome or a palate that didn’t close. The doctor’s words took your breath away. It was just like the time at recess in the fourth grade when you didn’t see the kick ball coming, and it knocked the wind right out of you.

Some of you left the hospital with a healthy bundle, then, months, even years later, took him in for a routine visit, or scheduled him for a checkup, and crashed head first into a brick wall as you bore the brunt of devastating news. It didn’t seem possible. That didn’t run in your family. Could this really be happening in your lifetime?

There’s no such thing as a perfect body. Everybody will hear something at some time or another. Maybe the affliction will be apparent to curious eyes, or maybe it will be unseen, quietly treated with trips to the doctor, therapy or surgery. Mothers of children with disabilities live the limitations with them.

Frankly, I don’t know how you do it. Sometimes you mothers scare me. How you lift that kid in and out of the wheelchair twenty times a day. How you monitor tests, track medications, and serve as the gatekeeper to a hundred specialists yammering in your ear.I wonder how you endure the clichés and the platitudes, the well-intentioned souls explaining how God is at work when you’ve occasionally questioned if God is on strike.I even wonder how you endure schmaltzy columns like this one-saluting you, painting you as hero and saint, when you know you’re ordinary. You snap, you bark, you bite. You didn’t volunteer for this, you didn’t jump up and down in the motherhood line yelling, “Choose me, God. Choose me! I’ve got what it takes.”

You’re a woman who doesn’t have time to step back and put things in perspective, so let me do it for you. From where I sit, you’re way ahead of the pack. You’ve developed the strength of the draft horse while holding onto the delicacy of a daffodil. You have a heart that melts like the chocolate in a glove box in July, counter-balanced against stubbornness of an Ozark mule.You are the mother, advocate and protector of a child with a disability. You’re a neighbor, a friend, a woman I pass at church and my sister-in-law. You’re a wonder.~~Lori Borgman is a columnist, author, and speaker and can be found at http://www.loriborgman.com/

Weight Loss....

I promise this will be quick. I don't know how many of you are not happy with your weight, but I am really sick of being FAT! I gained so much weight when I was pregnant with Dylan and he will be 5 in July. We found out after he was born that my thyroid was barely working and contributed to my fatness. It took awhile to get the right dosing, but I am still overweight. I've trained and run 2 marathons, 1 half marathon, and a bunch of 5 and 10 k's. So what's up???? I have no idea. So I am pleading with anyone that lives close to me to start a walking or running program with me. I hate exercising by myself. So if anyone is interested in getting together to run, walk, jog, bike, whatever, please let me know. Dylan turns 5 at the end of July and I would like to be at least 20 pounds lighter of course 50 would be great too, but I have to be realistic.

Respite Worker

Okay, so as you know we have a unique family situation. I can't call just anyone to come watch my kids. Not that parents just call anyone, but I think you guys know what I mean. A respite worker (that's someone that watches our kids, especially Dylan) comes to our house so I can get a break from driving to therapies, medical appointments, and everything else I drive Dylan to. Respite allows me to go shopping, take a nap, read a book, take a shower, you get the idea. Our worker decided she needed to get married and moved away. We miss her terribly. We are in the process of trying to find a few new workers so we have options. So if you know of anyone that is at least 18, responsible, punctual, tidy, clean, and that isn't psycho, send them our way. We are also looking for someone that will interact with our kids and not just watch TV or stare at them. I can explain the whole process to them. It's not a "full time job", but it could be extra spending cash or money to pay bills. We are allotted so many hours a quarter and I divide into the three months. So they would work about 64 hours a month. If you or anyone you know would be interested, please contact me.

Weekend Projects

So I've spent the last 2 Saturdays doing yardwork and getting the yard ready to plant my flowers for the season. So here's the finish product. I still have more flowers to plant. It seems never ending.

Happy Spring to Everyone!!! Hope everyone is enjoying this beautiful weather!!!

I have a wonderful husband!!!!!

Kalen took this past Monday off so I could go to a doctors appointment and then head to Mellow Me Out for an afternoon of relaxation. Kalen bought me a gift certificate back in January and I finally redeemed it. It was awesome. I love Kalen so much. He takes time to consider my feelings. I appreciate him so much, not just because he got me a gift certificate but because he cares. Now I need to pay him back with a day off for him. Not sure what I should do for him. Any ideas???? He likes to golf but his back injury causes him not to be able to do as often. So what's a good way to let him get a break away from the house????

House update as of 5/6/08

So here's my bedroom and bathroom. There has been so much progress. We are so happy. At this rate, the job might be done early or even on done time. We couldn't ask for more. We decided to go with a tile shower in the master bath, so if we decide to expand on this house the bathroom will be almost all handicapped accessible for Dylan. We would move him into our room and have double french doors where our current window his, so he would have access to the new family room if we expand. We are so excited. Our life just got a little easier. We currently have to lift him in an out of a bathtub from his bathchair and it is killing our backs. But that's life at our house. Anyhow.....we are counting down the days until we can sleep in our room and take a shower without having to move a bathchair and a million bath toys. I hope I don't sound like I'm complaining. That's not my intent.
Here's the tile that we picked. Man was that a pain. I am so picky. I wanted to make sure it would work with the new countertop and cabinet from the first time around since they are still basically brand new. No sense in replacing them:)

Out on a safari

Brianna found Kalen yard working hat. It looked so cute on her. Of course she "hammed" it up. She sure loves to get her pics taken. This kid loves to play outside. She loves to get dirty as well as play with water. I am currently looking for a good water table possible one that can also have sand in it on the other side. She loves to be outdoors. She gets it from her dad:)

Some static cling:)

Our explorer found an orange blossom and was so intrigued by it.

Look what I found............

Could I be any cuter?????? We think she is pretty dang cute.

The Sacramento Zoo

We did it!!!!! We got brave and decided to go on a family outing to the zoo. For those you of you that have a child or children with special needs, know how difficult it can be to go places. When we go places, we feel like a traveling circus. We have the wheelchair, feeding supplies, formula, vibrating toys, etc.... That's just for Dylan. Then we have to deal with all the strange looks from people. You would think that people have never seen a child in a wheelchair before. Depending on my mood sometimes I'll say what are you looking at, smile politely or completely ignore them. For Brianna there is a stroller, which she will not end up in. She of course wants to walk, diapers (not any longer, she's potty trained now), snacks, juice, hat, sunglasses, and of course her blanket. We were so proud. I know it might sound silly to most of you, but going to the zoo is a big deal for us. It's really hard to find activities for both of our kids to do, let alone be able to do it as a family. We had an enjoyable time. we stopped for Coldstone ice cream on the way hom. Brianna missed out on the ice cream since she fell asleep. Here's some pics of our day a few Saturdays back.

Brianna loves peguins so she was estatic to see the exhibit that was going on when went went. She loved that there were Brianna sized penguins. She was so excited!!!

Dylan really liked the zoo. We don't know how much he sees, but he can definitely take in all the sounds, and smells. The monkey sounds really made him laugh. My two favorite guys!!!!! Brianna and her cheese face.

A proud mommy and my two kids:) Brianna purposefully wouldn't look at the camera.

Dylan touching giraffe skin, with help of mommy. He didn't know what to think of it. It does feel really wierd.

We had a really fun time and hope to go do more things in the future. Any ideas of places to go that are kid friendly??

Dylan update

Our laughing, happy boy. Kalen took this pic so I don't know why Dylan is laughing. We really have been enjoying the peaceful Dylan. Back during the last part of February and all of March, Dylan was yodeling. He wasn't screaming, but we knew something was wrong. We went down the checklist of possible things it could be and when none of the other things checked out, the only thing left was that his reflux was bad. Sure enough after doing a Ph study, we found out that he was having tons of reflux episodes. It explains why he was so uncomfortable. We switched his reflux meds and the "yodeling" went away. I'm sad to say that it is causing him problems again. So we've up his meds and we see a new GI doctor in June. Can you believe that June is next month? Where is this year going?

Dylan was sick a couple of times in the past few weeks. I mean really sick. He was puking and then he spiked a fever. When that happens, we have to worry that Dylan might have aspirated. For those of you that don't know what that means, it means that it goes right back down and into Dylan's lung which in turn can cause pneumonia. We went to the doctor, after dealing with an awful advice nurse. I mean come on, I don't call for everything with either of my kids. Dylan's case a little different and the stupid advice nurse was trying to tell me that he had the flu. Did she miss that Dylan has special needs like, cerebral palsy, low muscle tone, a visual impairment, amongst a list of other things. We finally got an appointment with his pediatrician and we got the word that Dylan's lungs were clear. What a relief. He's ped. said it wasn't the flu. Yeah!!!! I know I knew it wasn't. The day we saw the doctor, Dylan puked like 7 times while Kalen was giving him a bath. We are suspecting that it's his reflux. Poor kids. We feel so bad for him. We hope the new dosage of medicine will work and we can have our happy, mellow, non-yodeling Dylan back:) Think good thoughts!

Cinderelly, Cinderelly.......

All of sudden Brianna came running into the room saying, Cinderelly dress, Cinderrelly dress. I was thinking to myself...what is she talking about. Of course she said, "Come Here" and leaded me into her bedroom and wanted me to open her closet. She adamantly pointed to the dress Stephanie made her last summer. She found her dress up stuff..... tiara and high heels and pranced around the room and also twirled. How she walks in the shoes is hilarious. We've all commented that she has good balance, because her play shoes are way to big. She loves playing princess. I couldn't be happier, because she also loves to play in the dirt and loves snails and worms.... Weird I know.

Brianna loves to say that she is beautiful. We couldn't agree more. Sometimes she even wants to put makeup on, but I have to tell her that for right now it's just for mommies, but she can wear lip gloss or chapstick. She always puckers up. We call it her monkey face.





We hope that one day she will find her prince and live happily ever after:)

Walking in her brother's shoes.....

Brianna not loves to put on Dylan's shoes. She is so proud that she is able to put them on and Velcro them. Of course Dylan doesn't mind since he loves the sound of Velcro. She cracks me up. The shoes according to Brianna are now hers and not Dylan's. Of course, everything is hers. Don't you love the toddler's motto..."It's mine".

Brianna is such a goof, but that's why we love her!