It's been awhile

Friday evening I got a text from my friend Stacie asking me if I was doing anything fun last night and if I want to go get a pedicure. I hadn't had one since the day before Dylan's funeral. So of course I wanted (needed) one and since I can't see my feet due to the watermelon I call my belly, I needed them to look pretty for others. Plus I was holding onto a Christmas gift I had received that needed to be redeemed. (Thanks Brian & Lori). It was the first time in almost 9 months that I felt a twinge of enjoyment. It felt foreign, strange and good at the same time. If you need a good laugh, picture two pregnant women, one about to give birth and one a few weeks behind walking into the nail place together. We definitely are a sight to see.

After our pedicure we went for a walk in the freezing cold night. In a way it was invigorating and then painful at the same time. I started having contractions so that wasn't good. Stacie was suppose to be the one feeling those. Resting made them stop.

Getting together with Stacie is always therapeutic for me. Since we both have had children die, it gives us an opportunity to talk about them and how we are feeling. Although she's 2 1/2 years farther along grieving she gets me. I feel safe sharing my feelings knowing that probably at one time or another she's felt similar. So to Stacie, I'm so glad we are friends. It sucks that we have to be on this path of having a child die but I'm glad we are on it together.

This morning I was able to go get my hair done. Kalen had surprised me with a gift certificate to do so. He knew I had been wanting to get it done but just couldn't bring myself to go and do it. I needed some forcing. So this morning I went and got it done. I'm pleased with it and it brightened my spirit for a few moments. Keep in mind Fridays and Saturdays are hard for me. It marks another week since Dylan has been gone. So to me the fact that I was able to go and do those things is huge.

After I was done at the salon, I met up with my longtime childhood friend, Meghan. We've known each other our entire lives. We went to Olive Garden for lunch. I have been craving it so much lately. Those that know me, know I love Italian food. We had a great time chatting and catching up. Thank you Meghan for the laughs and conversations. The waiter was AWESOME and gave me a ton of breadsticks and the after dinner mints to take home. We had great service. I guess it pays to take a pregnant lady to a restaurant.

So although the 9 month mark is coming up on Monday, being with friends has helped make this weekend a little more bearable. I felt a small glimpse of sunlight in my life today and am grateful for that.



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